Agony Aunt: Spinning out of Control
Dear Gael, As a window cleaner I love the freedom I have to work my own hours, it means I have plenty of time to get out and see me mates, but sometimes life just seems to spiral out of control, and things come racing at me. Three weeks ago I stopped drinking and using coke, but now me head just feels battered, like I’m stuck in a pit and not having fun any more. But I don’t wanna go back to the madness. How can I make life better again? Thanks, Ronaldo.
Dear Ronaldo, thank you for asking me this question. Just to clarify for our readers, you visited me in person for a reading, and I am grateful that you are allowing me to use your reading as my first column on British Tarot. It’s a perfect fit, and I hope others can find hope from your situation.
Using the Gilded Tarot by Ciro Marcetti, together we pulled a three card spread to answer your question, using the Three As of Awareness, Acceptance and Action. The cards we pulled were:
1. Awareness: The Devil
2. Acceptance: 9 of Cups inverted
3. Action: The Lovers inverted
At a glance this tells me that you have already started to become aware that drug and alcohol use isn’t having the same pleasant effect as it used to, but is rather becoming a burden. You have already accepted that your life is upside down as a result of this, and you are having doubts about the wisdom of continuing to socialise in the same circles which have been putting temptation in your way. You are ready, in fact to take the action necessary to turn your life around.
So, let’s take a look at each card in detail:
First you drew Card XV – The Devil. Although greatly feared, this card can help us move forward in leaps and bounds when it appears. In your case it is drawing your attention to the underlying issues which you need to become aware of in your life, and The Devil refers to Temptation.
In your case you have already become aware that the Temptations which you are battling with are sinful, and that the pleasures you used to gain from turning to them are slowly but surely disappearing. Rather than the lift you used to get from using, you now feel these are simply dragging you down into the burning depths.
It is worth noting that the punishment which comes with the sin is of our own making; in order to escape from what is effectively a burning hell, all we need to do is let go of the temptations which are keeping us there. In other words, walk away. This is never easy to do. We may feel that life wouldn’t be complete without these temptations. We may be afraid that letting go of these temptations comes with too great a price, for example our friends. And yet when we look at our Devil, he is not trapped in the burning flames, he can walk away at any time. He just needs to build up the courage to let go and step away from the fire.
If this card has appeared in a position of awareness, it is letting you know that you have finally reached that stage where you’re fed up of burning in hell. Now, the pain is outweighing the pleasure. You don’t want to go any deeper in to the burning depths. In other words, having gone deep enough, you have finally reached your bottom. This card appears just as we are ready to turn around and climb back up the steps to sanity.
The next card you drew, in a position of Acceptance, is the 9 of Cups. Nines indicate that we are coming towards the end of our journey, and the Cups are the suits of emotion. In this card a happy man stands behind barrels of wine, and he raises a cup high as though in a celebratory toast, whilst there are several other cups ready to be handed out for the party to begin.This is always a good card to receive in a reading, and it bodes well for the future.
However, in your case the card is inverted. This tells me that you are feeling drained. It’s interesting to see how the cups are all upside down now, as though the life force is draining out of them, and the celebration is at an end. but this card appears in this aspect when there is a new beginning to be had. It is likely that you are in a good place, but simply need to believe that you are in a good place.
Having been off the booze for three weeks now, the cravings are past; but there is probably a sort of empty place in your heart somewhere. That feeling that life should be great, and when you look at it, it feels great, but for some reason it’s not great. Like there’s an empty space there which needs filling… Well, this card has appeared to remind you that yes, life is indeed great. And once you have gained acceptance that it can be great without the crutches you have been used to, then it will right itself and fall into place.
So, how to do this. Well, the Lovers inversed has appeared to advise you what to do next. The Lovers usually speaks of a union of minds, despite the fact we tend to think of sexual relationships when this card appears! It’s inversion suggests that one such union is turning a little sour on you. Perhaps your circle of friends, who you have been near and dear to for so many years, is now lacking the intellectual and spiritual stimulation you require now that you have started on a path of spiritual growth. Perhaps you find it tempting, when you see them in situ, to have “just the one”. Well, it’s worth remembering that once we’ve started it’s not easy to stop… and if we stay away from the first one, then we simply can’t get hammered.
Up in Inverness, you will see a sign around the rooms of Fellowship that reads “If you fly with the crows, you’ll get shot with the crows”. Well, nobody likes to hear this, but perhaps it is possible that spending time with your old friends is placing you too near the temptations you are trying to get shot of. It is likely that sometime soon you will meet a new circle of like minded people who will be able to offer you the mental and spiritual stimulation you need to fill the gap which will be left due to the resistance of temptation.
So, in conclusion, these cards suggest that you are ready to take the steps towards sobriety. You have made a good start by letting go of the temptations which were bringing you down… now you just need to be sure to hang out with like minded people who will support you on your path; people who will be happy to enjoy sobriety with you, and people who don’t need lubricant in order to be comfortable in your company.
I truly hope it helps you to move on. Remember, nothing is ever set in stone, and it is said that “Once we know, we can change our minds”. If you would like clarification on anything, please feel free to ask, I am here to help. I wish you the best of luck in your new life. And do think of this as a new life… one free from the shackles binding us to the flames!
All the best,
Gael x
As a long term member of various 12 step fellowships, Gael has a broad experience of counseling people who have been struggling with issues such as alcoholism and addiction; as well as women who have suffered abuse at the hands of alcoholics and addicts. She also sponsors women through the steps in fellowships which handle co-dependent relationship issues. As a guest columnist she brings her experience of this recovery to her readings, helping people to work through their underlying issues in a manner which will enable them to move forwards with gratitude.
If you have a dilemma which you think Gael might be able to help you untangle, please send her an email: gaelerdhart@yahoo.com
______________________
Please note: This reading should be viewed as entertainment only. It does not substitute for the consultation of medical, psychological, legal or financial professionals. This reading is not legally binding.
If you feel you require further help, please follow this link to see a list of useful helplines and advice centres: http://www.tabi.org.uk/help-lines/
About Post Author
